My Glee Based Dream or Nightmare...still not sure which.

Have you ever had one of those moments when you remember parts of your sleep movie, but can't figure out if it was a dream or a nightmare?

Last night, my sleep movie baffled me. I woke up in a state of confusion. I didn't know whether to be afraid or to be mildly amused.

And now for your sheer enjoyment, this was my dream!!!

In the beginning,I dreamed that I was in a high school hallway of some kind. Everybody I knew was there, even Sir Oliver. In the middle of the dream through the Cafeteria door walks Rachel Berry. She was moving fast and when she got closer to me she grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the front doors. Waiting was Kurt and Mercedes in a Ford Explorer. I got in and looked at Mercedes who kept morphing into Finn. We drove for what seemed like hours and we got on highway 71. Once on the highway Fincedes spoke. Fincedes said " We are not going to make it." Rachel said "We are fine I know a shortcut." Kurt and I were in the back both looking out of our windows. For no reason at all I started to quietly sing "Someone To Watch Over Me." Rachel turned around from the front seat and said " Kurt you were right." We were coming up on an off ramp, when a guy wearing "Hammer" pants and sitting cross legged on a motorcycle pulled up beside us. He started waving his arms trying to get Fincedes to take the off ramp. Kurt started screaming, Rachel was crying and singing some Liza song that I couldn't quite recognize and Fincedes was now going 170 down the highway. I must have screamed "STOP!" because all of the sudden the car stopped moving. We were the only people on the road, and decided to get out of the car.

Suddenly the sky went black and thunder cracked and lightning lit up the sky. The road began to open up. Kurt started screaming again. Fincedes yelled "Get back to the car!" But none of us could move. Suddenly there before us was 200ft tall Sue Sylvester. Kurt fainted at the site of all that gym suit material. Fincedes was already back in the car and had put it in reverse. I was left with Rachel. The Sue Monster started yelling "YOU THINK THIS IS HARD?" while throwing coconuts at us. I turned to look at Rachel and was about to suggest that we run, when she suddenly morphed into Quinn. Quinn was now dressed in a hula skirt and started singing "I've Got A Lovely Bunch of Coconuts." And just as quickly as the dream started it was over. I was back standing in the hallway of high school but this time I held one of those keyboard guitar things in my hands.

Peace

Let's Talk Turkey!

When you are a single person, like I happen to be, it can often be hard to cook things for one. But I decided this year to go ahead with my Thanksgiving festivities. Being a single person who often times can not make up her mind, did not get her turkey until the day before.

I rushed to a very crowded Super Walmart in the early morning on Thanksgiving Eve. I was mad because there were way too many and I had to 500 miles away in an area that I can only describe as the "Ghetto Parking Lot". It was just rocks and other angry shoppers.

I went straight to the Turkey Bin and looked in...and what did I find NOTHING!!! Panic and the smell of body odor from the guy next to me started to set in. I wrinkled my nose and thought " How are there no turkeys?" I was getting more upset and the odor was getting worse. I moved away and thought for a brief second. Then it happened right there in the Goose Bin were three misplaced turkey's. I was overjoyed!!! I was no longer panicked and I had successfully moved away from Mr. Stinky Head!!! I picked up the first turkey. 23 pounds...um no. I picked up the second turkey 21.blah pounds...WHY IS THIS HAPPENING!!!?? I touched the third turkey and said "Please dear Lord, please I don't want to eat a Swanson's frozen turkey dinner." I turned the tag around and 14.blah pounds stared at me. I immediately wondered if I should but thought I am alone and I don't need 14 pounds of turkey. But then I saw Mr. Stinky heading toward me, and I grabbed my 14 pound bird and ran.

Like Jerome Bettis I skillfully made my way to the checkout, cradling my prize. TOUCHDOWN!!!! But no there was a flag on the play and I was hit with a 20 people before me penalty! The crowd was restless, the booing seemed endless.

Once home I began to think of all the wonderful things that I could do with so much turkey. Cause "Who doesn't love turkey, Sir Oliver?" Sadly Sir Oliver could not answer because he was laughing to hard and secretly wishing for a Swanson's dinner.

Well folks I am here to tell you that A SINGLE PERSON ALONE ON THANKSGIVING DOES NOT NEED A 14 POUND TURKEY!!! There was turkey in the fridge for sandwiches, there is frozen turkey in freezer, there is still some homemade turkey noodle soup, there was curry turkey with onions, rice and veggies, and for no reason at all there was a strange concoction that the only thing I could identify was the turkey (it tasted good though) and finally the turkey smoothie which seemed like a really good idea and turned out to be a really really bad one. The fur kids are still laughing about the turkey smoothie, which ended up on the wall, counter, floor, sink Sir Oliver's food bowl and a nice little trail from my kitchen through my living room, bedroom and ended in my bathroom.

So what did I learn from my Thanksgiving Holiday experience? Turkey smoothies are hard to get out of the carpet!!!